Sad-mad-sad sandwich digestion:

Breathe. And then breathe some more. Deep from the bottom of your spine.

Now, repeat several times: people see what they want to see.

People hear what they want to hear, what they think suits them best at the given moment.

People choose their own truth regardless what you are saying, writing, describing.

Even if you thought they were close and knew you well.

Now take some more deep breaths.

Because…

There is no one truth reality. Each of us have a different one; even the same person may have one truth at one point and a different one at another time. It’s just the nature of the game called Life. Our bodies change, our heart and minds change, our perspective changes.

Even if we choose, yes, choose to feel hurt, we may find comfort in the fact that whatever someone does, he or she is doing that out of his or hers best intentions due to a personal search for happiness. Can we really blame someone for wanting happiness? Happiness makes people feel better, be more creative, do better things, isn’t it?

Even if one chooses to distort every word we say, turn it completely around so we are left perplexed at the sheer possibility of such occurrence there is still a valuable lesson to be learned on the other side (of a tunnel, of course).

Yes, that word. “A lesson”.

I can see you biting into that sad-mad-sad sandwich, again.

Yes, because feeling of being hurt and losing a friend can do that but… We do have a choice in perceiving such unexpected circumstances, don’t we?

Can we ever “lose” or “have” anything that subtle in its core?

Maybe it’s just about cycles, again. One cycle ends, another begins.

Maybe it’s due to some enormous lesson that was to be learned on both sides?

I don’t necessarily support that idea that we learn best when in pain but maybe sometimes that’s the only way it works? “Sometimes” meaning when we missed all other previous signs and warnings.

Maybe.

Maybe, even though it was said the help was wanted, needed and asked for, actually it wasn’t so and I was asked to come in just to serve as a justification, a camouflage for some other things and intentions? But… I still can’t believe that particular person would do that or that I would be so… (insert the appropriate word of your choice)?

I’m still pondering over all this. I’m confused…
In the light of what one smart man said: confusion is a brilliant state of mind because it definitely leads to new insights, I’m moving on.

Now throw that sad-mad-sad sandwich away.

Breathe.

Look around.

Life goes on and changes are inevitable. Sometimes we only later find out “why” and what the lesson of that particular event was and to what good things it lead.

Because…

Good is inevitable too.
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And… A disclaimer or a note to a wandering reader: all I write here are „notes to myself“, my personal reminders, so when I write „you“ or „we“ it is just a figure of speech. I am not giving advices to anyone but myself. If it makes it easier, imagine I am writing to myself in the future, to remind myself on certain occurrences and what were the lessons I learned. Many times this may not make sense to some of you, but it will to me. I hope…

Focusing on good, creative, inspiring, life-supporting people, things, events,

doesn’t mean I’m avoiding the mud, it merely means that way I’m equipped with more tools and ideas how to go through the mud once facing it and actually use it as a learning curve, it will even serve me as an exfoliant and it means that during the passing through it I will be aware I will have a water source at the end to wash it off which will give me strength to pass through the challenging times.

We tend to grow during challenging times and growing can be painful and can blur the mind and focus and we can make it better or worse; we can put a blue filter on the lens and everything will be in that hue, no matter what colours are on offer around us the filter will distort them, so I’m leaving this post as a reminder to myself that once the unsupporting filters are off there are good, educative parts of the so called mud pits in life and that there is a refreshing, cleansing water on the other end where I can also mould this mud into something good, inspiring and life-supporting.

One day it’s a walk by the sea, scent of rosemary, jasmin or a stone pine, the other day it’s a note from a friend, then a piece of music or a line in a book… gentle guidelines, reminders for the “right” path, the one that is in congruency with all that I am.

May this post stay as such a reminder for this feeling of gratefulness that marks this day.